lady before I go.

I only wish your happiness.

Do not mind the past. You are not to live in the past.

Have the courage and forget the past. You are to create a new future.

You are to live from moment to moment in the reality. Anazawa no longer

exists in the reality.[61]

Unlike the first two letters, which contained the words, "I have no nostalgic emotions,"

he wrote: "It's too late now, but I would like to say some of my wishes."

He then listed the books he wanted to read, what he wanted to see, what he wanted to

listen to, and that he was eager to see her, and to talk to her.[62]

The last three writings probably spoke for themselves and require no further

explanation. They just made clearer the different ways of thought the college students

had from the others who attended military school.

Not only in writing had the thoughts of the pilots appeared. In actions, and in speeches

too were the emotions visible. Corporal Mineyoshi Takahashi, according to Mr. Yasuo

Takahashi, his older brother, had changed since entering military school, and his

attitude in talking with Mr. Takahashi was not as it used to be.[63] (The way Mr. Y.

Takahashi explained the differences before and after Mineyoshi joined the military was

similar to the way Mr. S. Araki had explained Yukio's changes.) He remembers that

the last time they met, he took Corporal Takahashi into the ship he was working in.

Suddenly, Corporal Takahashi had asked his brother: "Which part of the ship is the

weakest?" Mr. Takahashi remembers that he was extremely surprised, but pointed to

the place which he knew was the weakest.[64]

This reveals that Corporal Takahashi was thinking of his mission rather calmly. He had

asked the question, probably thinking of which part of the ship he should drive his plane

into.[65]

Corporal Takamasa Senda before his departure had been singing many songs with

children, and at times, sat quietly alone, burning old letters in an expression of deep

thought. The last night, he looked up at the stars and said, "You are lucky, this will be

the last time I see the stars...I wonder how my mother is doing...."[66] His singing with

the children was probably to forget the coming mission, and his burning the letters was

to forget the past. Saying that he wanted to be able to see the stars again is an

indication that he wanted to live.

Whether patriotism was the answer to the way they felt can be doubted in the case of

Second Lieutenant Fumihiro Mitsuyama. His real name was Tak Kyong-Hyong.[67]

He was Korean, but like other Japanese men, he too was sent to war, and was chosen

as a Kamikaze pilot. The last evening before his mission, he went to the cafeteria

appointed by the Army, which was run by a lady, Mrs. Tome Torihama, who was

called "Okasan" (mother) by the young Kamikaze pilots of Chiran Air Base. He went

up to her and said, "I will sing you a song of my country," and sang Ariran. By the

second verse he was in tears.[68] Because he was a graduate of college, he had not

volunteered willingly but was probably pressured to circle "desire earnestly" in the

survey, especially being a Korean.

According to survivors, all say that they felt quite calm, and normal. They were not

scared of death but were happy that the day had finally come.[69] Mr. Itatsu was a

pilot who had departed for the mission but because his engine had stopped on the way,

his plane fell into the sea, and he survived.[70] He says that he remembers being happy

when he was chosen for the mission.[71] He said that the young people then who had

gone into military schools did not have the ability to think logically, and therefore sent

applications without much thought. He also says that these pilots were really innocent,

and thought purely that they would be able to serve, and protect the country.[72] An

author and a critic, Tadao Morimoto said in a T.V. program that he believes that it was

not true that they were happy to die for the country.[73] Mr. Itatsu says that he

disagrees with him because some young and innocent pilots died believing they could

become happy dying that way.[74] Since Mr. Itatsu was one of the Kamikaze pilots

himself, his comments should be given more credibility than the comments made by

Tadao Morimoto who had been an officer in the Navy during the war, but was not

involved with the Kamikaze attacks himself.

Kiichi Matsuura, the author of the book Showa wa Toku (Showa Far Away) wrote

that he recalls the first planned date of the mission was like every other day, and no

special conversation took place. When he found that his aircraft would not function

properly, he suddenly felt the strong urge to live. His aircraft not functioning implied that

he would not die. Realizing that, he could only think of living. On his second "chance"

his plane was fine halfway. He was with two other pilots, and seeing one of them sink

into the sea, realized a problem in all their engines. The two returned. He recalls that

until the moment they decided to return, he was not at all scared, because they were

flying toward death. However, returning was frightening. He had to protect his life from

death.[75]

Finally, in an interview with a member of the Self Defense Force, Mr. Matsunaga, a

word which held the key to a better understanding was mentioned. The word was

"decision." To the question, "If something happened, would you not be afraid?" he

answered that it was his decision to enter such a world, and that he would not escape if

anything did occur.[76] Similarly, although it was with far more psychological pressure,

all the Kamikaze pilots had made the decision.

Conclusion

The pilots were, as a matter of fact, not radical nor extremely patriotic, but were the

average Japanese of the time. It was a dream for the young boys of late Taisho period

and early Showa to serve in the military, especially in the Air Force, as a career. Not all

pilots who wanted to become Kamikaze pilots could become one. Although this may

sound strange, there were so many volunteers to make the suicidal and fatal attacks,

that the military, to be fair, had to let the ones with the better grades go earlier. Because

of the aura that had covered Japan, the young pilots of 18 and 19 were eager to go.

Those of the Special Flight Officer Probationary Cadets who had their own thoughts

like Second lieutenants Suzuki, Uehara, and Anazawa were able to separate their

personal life from what was required of them to do for the war. They felt the

responsibility to go.

How exactly the pilots felt about the attacks could not be known but it seems that they

were, in general, happy that they could serve the country, but had other thoughts

towards death. Because the brainwashing done on the pilots trained in military schools

was so effective, it changed the priority of 'life, then country,' the other way around.

Life was made, by the atmosphere and education of the time, to be not the first priority,

but something that must be given up for the first priority, the Emperor and the country.

If they believed that ever-lasting happiness would follow their mission, there was

nothing for them to fear. Those who were not brainwashed (the college graduates) may

have felt fear. If they were able to detach themselves totally from life, they might have

felt better. Yet is detaching oneself from life really possible?

In any case, it seems that they were all optimistic. They volunteered, believing their

death might save their family, the ones they loved, and Japan. However, as a student

investigating fifty years after the events, it was not possible for me to understand exactly

how the pilots had felt towards their mission.

Appendix One

The Different Pilots' Training Schools in The Imperial Army Where the Kamikaze Pilots

Were Trained

The Youth Pilot Training School

The students who had graduated from the Youth Pilot Training schools had the

best flying skills of the Imperial Army. This schooling system had begun in 1933,

and lasted until the end of the Pacific War. The age range that was accepted into

this school was between 14 and 17. Originally, the time spent in the school was

three years. One year of general education in Tokyo and two years of

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